quick update

• i am terribly broke after booking the M hotel banquet. (YAY to confirm banquet venue!)
  to the extend that i don't even want to see a private doctor because i can't afford. this is how broke i am this month. and that freaking dentist bluff me say this month i only need to pay $140. i end up having to pay $210! WAH LAU. after my braces is done, i'm not going to thank her and will spoil her reputation.
  
• i am so broke that i cant even watch Macbeth. :( i really wanna watch it....
  

Zi Rui passed away. i was very traumatized for 2 days. really unexpected of her to do such foolish thing. She committed suicide by burning charcoal in her room n died of carbon monoxide. (to that b*tch who said you found a new way to die, u should die of being burnt by charcoal. ) if she has chose this path, what can we do. i always remembered her as the closest cell group member i've ever had, she was like a half sister. when she was around, the only thing my family didn't give her was extra set of house key. even kewei was sad.
she is dearly missed. i will remember her forever as life goes on.....

i've had quite abit of health problems these days. too much.
i grind my teeth EVERY NIGHT. (i just heard it myself yesterday. damn loud.)
previously i have had frequent nose bleed. as much as 4 times a week.
vomitted a few times midnight.
then i had terrible cramp that i couldn't go to work.
now i have chest pain. no lump found but going to see a heart specialist.

too much sickness.

then i found out that all these sickness have a common cause.

ANXIETY....

i don't even know what i'm anxious about!!

maybe life has too much things i shouldnt be worrying and am mad anxious about.

feel like taking a 1 week off to clear my mind and don't - DON'T think about work, wedding, money and live like my life doesnt need money.

but going on a holiday needs money! URGH.